Tom Holland and Zendaya are Instagram-official. 

Eva: An on-screen to real-life romance. This is what celebrity tabloid dreams are made of. They seem to give off different energies, but I am for it all the way. 

Audrey: No comment.

Clara: I think this is a publicity stunt.

Sam: I don’t really know who these people are, but I’m worried I won’t hit my three pieces of published content per quarter quota, so I’m chiming in here.

John Mulaney and Olivia Munn are expecting a child together. 

Audrey: Crying and throwing up right now. Petunia deserves a better father. I can’t believe John tricked us with that Romeo + Juliet couples halloween costume. Revolting. An insult to Shakespeare but mostly Baz Luhrman.

Eva: Usually I’m all, stop with the dramatics, Audrey. We’re journalists. But not this time. John, who had entire shows dedicated to talking about how he and his ex-wife (goddess Anna-Marie Tendler) didn’t want kids, is going to be a father? The whole thing sounds like a rom-com with Anna-Marie as the lead. Left by her husband, he’s having a baby with another woman months later. She needs to start fresh. 

Clara: Look, I’m all about telling everyone “you do you” but sometimes I think there are people that should not have children. John Mulaney is one of those people. I think as of right now he’s been through a lot of life changes in the past year and it would be for the better if he held off on trying to take care of another human being. BUT the baby will be beautiful.

Sam: Why? 

Harry Styles is on tour, and Olivia Wilde attended his opening show. 

Eva: I’m fine with the age gap, I’m fine with her having kids. But, similarly to the Anna-Marie situation, Harry and Olivia’s relationship feels like a punch in the face to Jason Sudeikis. He’s Ted Lasso! How could you do this, Olivia? Why are all of these celebrities moving on so fast? 

Audrey: Distraught and disgusted.

Clara: Yes, I think Harry Styles is super cool and I love his music as much as the next girl. That being said I don’t think he has very much going on upstairs. I don’t feel like his relationships are as deep as he feels they are. When I think about him having an actual conversation with someone, I see him saying, “Wow that’s so deep” at a piece of fruit.

Sam: As our managing editor, Liam, once said, “It’s dumb and I don’t care about what they do with their lives.” (Actually, he said it many, many times.)

Kylie Jenner is pregnant with her second child. 

Eva: To be honest, this was not that exciting. Jenner seems to have wanted a second child for a while. R.I.P Keeping Up With the Kardashians, we could have gotten some stellar content from this pregnancy. 

Audrey: I just want to see Kylie up to her hijinks again. I hope she names her kid something cool like Messiah or Blister.

Clara: How will Kanye feel about this child? Any more tweets from him?

Sam: ​​https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=GibiNy4d4gc 

Jessica Chastain and Oscar Isaac are flirting on the red carpet. 

Eva: Flirting heavily. I really like this news because no one seems to be affected, even the spouses of both parties. Plus, the video of him smelling her arm is just really weird and crazy. A+ publicity for their show and A+ celebrity friendship. 

Audrey: It’s called showbiz. Also it’s Oscar Isaac. 

Clara: I don’t really know what this means.

Sam: All of you need to stop reading People magazine. It’s rotting your brains.