With homecoming just around the corner and the familiar rhythm of the school year, love lingers in the air this fall. Here is our first attempt of 2023 at answering the student body’s heart-felt inquiries.
How can I ask out a guy who I’ve never talked to without making it awkward? I usually get attracted to a guy just noticing him from a distance. Once I have a full blown crush on them, even having a regular conversation and trying to befriend them seems terrifying. Abruptly asking them out feels easier to me than befriending them over time, because you just have to be brave once, instead of having to summon up courage to talk to them every conversation. However, asking out a guy randomly has never been successful for me. What should I do?
You are totally not alone. Anxiety over asking someone out is a very common experience, and honestly, there’s really no way to avoid that. Fear of rejection and awkwardness are pretty much inevitable, but that does not mean all hope is lost! Firstly, you don’t have to open with a full-blown date, ease into it-try asking him to “hang out” or even just a conversation with no immediate intention of anything else. Take the pressure off, but shoot your shot!
I still haven’t gotten a sign from my “talking stage,” so I’m pressed. He asked me to HOCO but I still want a sign (I told him that) but it’s a week and a half till HOCO and I’m signless.
Even though a HOCO sign may not seem like a big deal, if you’ve communicated that this is important to and he refuses, that could be very telling for what he may be like later in the relationship. Don’t waste your time chasing after someone who is not willing to work for you. If this is an isolated occurrence, don’t read too much into it, but be aware in case this is a pattern! You deserve to be treated right.
There’s this guy. Well actually, there’s a lot of them but that’s not the point, it’s good to have options. What should I do if one of the guys, the most likely to work out of the bunch, liked me at some point and still might, but he asked another girl out to HOCO, even though prior to this, he barely talked to her.
Okayyy we see you – there’s nothing wrong with having a few options, as long as you are clear about your intentions with each. However, regarding the one specific guy there may be some more reflection you need to do. Why is he the most likely to work out? What about him sets your relationship apart from the others? If you can understand your own feelings about him, you’ll find insight into how to proceed. His decision to ask another girl may not mean anything, but you won’t know without communication. If it’s worth it to you, talk to him.
I’ve had a crush on this girl since 7th grade and I’m having thoughts of asking her to HOCO, but she’s kinda popular and I’m not. I’m also a girl and I don’t think she likes girls. What should I do? Do I shoot my shot and risk humiliation by her popular friends or do I keep my crush silent?
Living in the age of prom-posals and social media pressure is an immense, unspoken trouble all teenagers are currently facing. There’s a lot of pressure to have large, flashy HOCO proposals, but it doesn’t have to be that extravagant. If you are unsure what her reaction may be, or just value simplicity over public expressions, it’s totally ok to ask her in private. If she doesn’t feel the same way, although rejection sucks, you are going to be okay!
My boyfriend of one year broke up with me this summer, because he cheated on me and fell for a different girl. I haven’t been single in so long and I miss having a significant other so much. Seeing everyone get asked out to HOCO just breaks my heart because all I can think of is the fact that I’m single and I feel like no one will ever love me again.
We are so sorry for you. No one deserves that kind of betrayal from a significant other. Your feelings are completely valid. It’s totally normal to miss a significant other after a tough breakup, regardless of how they treated you. Remember that this situation does not say anything about you, but rather about your boyfriend. Allow yourself to experience the full weight of your heartbreak, but also find appreciation for this new season of your life. Being single allows you with time to be a bit selfish- focus on yourself and feeling valid regardless of having a significant other.
